Existence and Non-Existence

I’ve written about an “ideal end-state” of the evolution of Life, which we seem to be moving toward.  This end-state seems to be the perfection, through evolution, of an organism in which the qualities of Spirit can be expressed naturally, as a self-existent quality of that future being.

We see evidence of this idea in the trend of the development of matter and life, which has brought forth ever-increasingly complex and intelligent forms, culminating in modern human beings, who are the present peak of the evolutionary mountain.

Along the way, life has been brutal, blissful, boring, bleak, and beautiful. We, as humans, feel all these states in our lives, if we live long enough and experience a wide enough variety. (Don’t ask “of what?” Instead, ponder that last phrase for a minute.)

Most of us strive to feel the blissful and beautiful as much as possible, when we are able to feel or at least imagine those feelings. Many of us are unable even to imagine them when we are in the midst of brutal, boring, or bleak experiences. In the end, these feelings (and the multitude of others) are all that really matter in life, for they determine our choices and decisions.

In the best of circumstances, they light within us a spark that drives us to improve our state of being. At other times, we fall into the turmoil of the bleak or brutal present and stay there, sometimes for a long time. Every feeling or state feels eternal while we are in it.

Sometimes it can seem better not to exist at all, rather than to have to endure excruciating present circumstances. After all, life continues whether it brings us brutal or blissful events. In those times that we wish we did not exist or have to endure, we seek relief, as we always do when we feel negative. This is the realm of suicide (an attempt to end consciousness and therefore pain), chemical abuse (an attempt to reduce consciousness and therefore pain), and violence (an attempt to destroy externalized pain).

Life, though, continues to exist even beyond the physical. My own experience has hinted at this idea over and over again, enough that I accept it as fact and not hyperbole. I don’t know what existence we encounter after we die, but I feel that it’s related to the life we live here in the physical.

So, if I’m correct, non-existence isn’t even an option. Despite the pain, misery, unfairness, and brutality that we encounter and are forced (by being alive) to endure, to exit the game is only to continue the game on some other level—and, like Hamlet asked, “in that sleep of death who knows what dreams may come?”

“To be or not to be” is not the question. “Not to be” isn’t even possible—if I’m correct. Therefore, we must endure. In the cycle of life, with the variety of possible experience that lies before us, brutality and bleakness cannot endure forever. When death does not grant us possible reprieve from our misery (or, perhaps, only a continuation on some unknown level of the misery we’re trying to escape), the Divine spark within can light a fire that brings us again to bliss and beauty.

That Divine spark is the reason why we cannot un-exist. If this is true, then everything must happen for a reason, and the Divine Itself must be the guide of all our experiences, whether we want them or not, whether we know it or not. It might be a good idea, then, to try to understand what the Divine wants in this life—for us individually, as well as the world in its totality.

Because we cannot escape existence.

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